Dinner Theatre

I perform dinner theatre. Yup, untalented me now spends her days dancing and singing and doing just about ANYTHING to keep Nathan both in his highchair AND eating the food I give him. Right now he's starting doing delightful things such as saying "No" and pushing my hand or spoon or sippy cup away. He also LOVES the fact that by throwing food on the floor that Monty will come running. Need I add that Monty is FINALLY excited to have Nathan around? I mean, he gets PEOPLE FOOD NOW! Monty is BEYOND thrilled.. as soon as the highchair comes out Monty is underneath it, drooling, anxious and READY! Now to keep Nathan happy when I'm feeding him is a trial. I'm constantly trying to entertain him, and/or determine if he's saying "NO" because he is done with eating, or "NO" because he just likes to push my hand away and make a mess. So here's what I do:

1. Turn on the music. ANY music! I'm particularly fond of Lazytown and The Fresh Beat Band. Okay, fond is stretching it, but I can only listen to kiddie music for so long so I always need to mix it up a bit.
2. Dance around the highchair. To get the full visual you need to picture me in my standard uniform of yoga pants, pink tank tops, and bare feet that are in desperate need of a pedicure. I could have make-up on, or maybe not. But to keep Nathan entertained I am not above shaking what my mama gave me.
3. Finger food. When I hear "No" - usually what that means is Nathan is tired of me spoon feeding him and he wants to feed himself. So finger food is quickly cut up and put on the tray so Nathan can feed himself, or feed Monty. Really the choice is no longer mine.
4. Sippy cup. In between giving him bites of food off a spoon, I also throw down any distraction I can find. His own spoon, the measuring spoons, bits of waffle, his sippy cup. It all gets tossed down at regular intervals in the hopes I have given him what he wanted.
5. I let Nathan feed me. Jeff just saw this tonight and he thinks it's "disgusting", but it keeps Nathan happy so I do it. Towards the end of the meal I put my face close to his and he gets all smiley and I say "Is that for Mama"? Nathan than grabs whatever happens to be on his tray and shoves it in my face. I let him put it in my mouth and I saw "YUMMY" and make exaggerated chewing motions. The bad thing about this? Nathan's hands START OUT clean, but with the grabbing of food, feeding himself - let's just say it's not a pretty picture. But it keeps him happy and I am so far gone I just don't care that he's putting his grubby hands in my mouth.

I can only pray that nobody SEES the lengths that I go through to get Nathan to eat. But since Nathan STILL prefers to be carried in my arms instead of in his stroller, I have a feeling I'm setting myself up for about 10 years of ongoing mealtime performances. I'll be like the "Cats" of baby entertaining!