Writer's Block

So I've been working on a book that is more aimed at teenagers. I've got about 15 pages written so far and it's actually pretty darn good if I do say so myself. I know where I want the story to go... I know what I want to do.. I'm just having the hardest time GETTING there. I gave myself a week off and now I'm re-reading what I've written to try and see if inspiration strikes. And yet I am STILL having a hard time coming up with the words. I think part of my problem is I am very good about writing descriptive phrases, telling the reader what is going on, but dialogue?? Dialogue I find VERY difficult to write, and write WELL. Maybe it would help if I wasn't so super-critical of my writing, but as an english major I have a hard time NOT being so picky. I want the story to flow, I want it to be INTERESTING, and I want it to live up to my rather high standards of what I look for in book. I want it to be something that I would pick up and read.. and LIKE. Any suggestions??? I'm desperate here people!!!

dislike for Strawberry Shortcake

When I was younger Strawberry Shortcake was pretty popular. And I disliked her. I disliked her because she had red hair and I thought she was ugly. Thus she was a bad role model for redheads everywhere - I took it personally. However.. after seeing the "new" Strawberry Shortcake, I am admitting my mistake in disliking the original. While the new Strawberry Shortcake is indeed "pretty", I really, really dislike how they've turned her into what looks like some sort of lolita-like wanna be doll. What is WITH this??? Don't believe me? Take a gander here:

I'm just surprised that they haven't given new Strawberry Shortcake breast implants. Now, I AM sort of hypocrite about this whole thing because I also adored Barbie when I was younger. Yes, Barbie, which according to some people is the root of all that is evil. But Strawberry Shortcake was NOT supposed to be Barbie. She was a little girl, and thus she was shaped like a little girl. No long hair and long lashes and a come hither pose. I guess I should be grateful that she's covered up and not wearing stillettos, but I'm just dismayed that they seem to be taking away the innocence from toys.

Longing, yes longing, for Diet Coke

I miss Diet Coke. I miss Diet Coke almost every day. Because I have Graves' Disease I am at a higher risk for miscarriage than most people, and part of my long list of "Things you may not eat or drink when pregnant" included caffeine. I'm not a coffee drinker, never did like the taste, and mostly drink tea or hot chocolate, or maybe seltzer water and juice, but Diet Coke. Oh Diet Coke and I have had a long, long love affair. Passionate, committed, devoted. I have loved Diet Coke deeply. Of all the things that I have had to give up.. it's the Diet Coke that I crave. And my God do I crave it. People at my work drink it right in front of me and I swear it calls my name. It taunts me as it sits there all bubbly and dark, looking so cool and refreshing. With just the right amount of flavor. Wait a minute - I'm drooling into the keyboard.

So today I went into CVS fully determined to purchase and drink my first Diet Coke in 6 months. I thought to myself "Self, you've been sooo good. There is NO WAY that this amount of caffeine is going to hurt you or your baby, just buy the freakin' Diet Coke and go on your way". I marched my way down to the coolers and stared at the Diet Coke. And walked away with a Caffeine-Free Diet Coke version (which by the way is NOT the same thing and I drank more out of a sense of having given up than a hankering for the taste). Apparently my bark is WAY worse than my bite. Or as Jeff likes to say, I am all talk. Sigh...

Bloody Nose

Wait, you didn't want to hear about my bloody nose? Too bad! Here comes the story!

Now, I am NOT prone to bloody noses but I guess one of the side effects of pregnancy is bloody noses. I certainly had NO idea this would be possible, but it is. The first time I got one Jeff and I were having a "discussion" about money. It was a very EMOTIONAL discussion and I felt my nose... drip. Thinking I just had a runny nose I reached for a tissue oh so casually and saw that Jeff had a look of complete and utter horror on his face. He RACED across the room had me sit down, head between the legs, everything. He even called my doctor and tried to casually ask if this was common. The nurse was very sweet and told him, yes, some women do get this when pregnant and not to worry about it. Well, NOTHING ends an argument quicker than blood dripping out of your nose!!! Very effective as a fighting technique, but not something I'd really like to repeat.

Fast forward to today. I'm at work, about 7:30am and booting up my computer and getting ready for our morning meeting. I feel my nose drip and reach for a tissue. Yes, you guessed it. Bloody nose. AT WORK!! So I'm at work trying DESPERATELY to discreetly clean myself up, but anytime I pull my tissue away to asses what's going on.. more blood just flows out. About 5 minutes later I looked like I was a victim in a slasher film. Blood on my sweater, blood on my pants.. it was awful. Need I remind everyone I work at the front desk at a PEDIATRIC DENTAL OFFICE! Now I cannot, cannot, sit out there and welcome small children and parents to the office when I'm covered in BLOOD! I head to the back room where everyone has advice and is being oh so sweet. For about an hour I try and stop the blood but it is just not clotting. I give up, tell my boss I should probably go home, and here I am. It FINALLY stopped, but the experience of driving home with a tissue rammed up each nostril is not one I care to repeat anytime soon.

Now I ask, why oh why does nobody TELL you these things?? I think it's a whole conspiracy thing to keep women uninformed. I'm here at home, feet up, lots of liquid to replace what I, er, leaked... and am so irritated I had to use a vacation day for a BLOODY NOSE! Gah... this better be the last one I get at work!!!!!

being oh so tired

I do really and truly wish that the tired feeling I've got would go away. I am so, so tired. So tired all the time and I'm tired of SAYING that I am tired! It's boring.. I've got no other symptoms really other than being exhausted. I think the problem lies in the fact that at night I do a lot of tossing and turning. Now, the tossing and turning is nothing new. As a long practicing insomniac I am sooo used to the tossing and turning. It's the fact that I can't STAY comfortable for the whole night that is new. It used to be that once I was asleep.. that was it. I was out till morning. Not so now. I'll be comfortable on one side for a few hours and wake up with a deep pain in my hip, now I need to turn over. And turning over is more of a process at this point.. it means moving my body pillow and repositioning it, it means waking Jeff up as I try and reposition myself. Remember, we share a full size bed so we're pretty darn close to each other, and now that I have a body pillow, there is NO extra space. So Jeff is up with me. This process repeats about three times during the night and is oh so not fun. It doesn't seem to matter WHAT time I go to bed.. it's not going to be a restful night regardless.

Oh, and I've just finished washing our baby boy's clothing and I've come to the conclusion he already has more clothes than Jeff and I put together!!!

nothing in particular

Just thought this was funny..

And for me, oh so true!

Heart Break

Today was a horrible Saturday. After a long discussion with Jeff, a discussion with our incredibly compassionate and sweet vet, and a burst of hysterics from me, we had my sweet cat euthanized. Anyone who has had a pet knows this is the most agonizing decision to make. Lily was 15 years old and I've had her since she was a baby. I bottle fed her since she was found as a stray and was too young to be on her own. She's seen me through college, multiple apartments, multiple jobs, hell, she's seen me through multiple relationships. She was my constant and I don't think you could find a more spoiled or pampered cat. Letting her go was beyond awful and I still can't believe she's gone. Since I don't want this post to be a complete sob fest, I thought I'd leave you with some of the funnier stories of Lily and her personality.

1. The first night Jeff stayed over she pooped in his bag. I guess she was letting him know that she was there first!

2. She liked to walk around the rim of the bathtub when I was taking a bath and would have tried to drink the bathwater if I let her.

3. Lily actually enjoyed being sung too and I would walk around the apartment with her slung over my shoulder like a big furry scarf and sing about how wonderful she was. She would purr the entire time.

4. She hated everyone and everything but me - but eventually learned to tolerate Jeff. She always loathed Monty though.

5. She loved ice cream and for a long time when I was single we would sit on the sofa together watching television and I would let her lick the bowl after I was done with ice cream. It was our Friday night ritual.

5. In summertime she would sit with her paw in her bowl of water... no idea why.

Weight

Tonight on the phone, my father aka Mr. Sensitive, told me that my high pregnancy weight (a weight that is so high I refuse to put the number out in the world but suffice to say I have NEVER weighed this much) is.... are you ready?

"The MOST he's weighed in his ENTIRE LIFE"!!!!!

My father, is six feet two inches.. and my high pregnancy weight is equivalent to his Michelin man weight. Lovely. Isn't that just lovely??? And how nice of him to share this with his emotionally sensitive daughter. I hope he knows that the last laugh WILL be mine and that I'm starting to research his nursing home right now... it's going to be a DOOZY!

Day Off

It was a busy weekend here in the Weiner household. On Friday I wasn't home from the moment I woke up to go to work around 9am until that night - well after 11pm. On Saturday it was pretty much the same thing so I was looking forward to doing nothing on Sunday. It sounded so blissful. I slept in (a little, since sleeping for me is just HARD now and I can never get and stay comfortable for long) and woke up, showered, and started laundry. From 10am until 6pm I washed and put away laundry, alternating with my Facebook addiction and my addiction to pretend shopping. You know, the Internet shopping where you fill up your cart with everything and anything under the sun just to see how much it would all cost and then empty it and move on the next site. No? Is it just me??? Anyway, that's all I did aside from a quick drive to the grocery store for milk and cereal and the lovely ambiance of someones child SCREAMING the entire time I was in the store. I heard this little girl screech from one end of the store to other and while I was impressed with her lung capacity, it was not conductive to a leisurely stroll of the aisles. I grabbed what I needed and was out the door FAST!

Now after all my complaining about how I just wanted to relax on Sunday... come 7pm I was bored. Bored with a capital B!!! So bored. And slightly cranky. As a result Jeff and I went to good ol Target and browsed storage containers, beauty products (for me) and DVD's (for Jeff). We just got home about 20 minute ago. So I ask you, is anyone else like this? Really looking forward to a day at home and then winding up bored out of their skull??? Is it just me??? Let me know because I do this a LOT and if its a personality quirk it might just be something I should work on!!

Weekends

This was my first weekend where I had BOTH days off. BOTH DAYS! I know!!! I had to stop my massage therapy job as I'd leave each Sunday shift all hunched over like the Hunchback of Notre Dame, meaning I'd spend a good three hours with a heat back on trying to recover. So bye bye to the massage job. So this weekend Jeff and I did some more comparison shopping for cribs and the such and we've found a pretty good deal we intend to purchase this week (you know, when its not snowing!!!). But we still have quite a bit to do.

1. Finish cleaning out the second bedroom aka the room where we shoved all our clutter

2. Paint

3. Wall to wall carpet

4. Nursery furniture

5. Blinds

6. Decorations

Here's a picture of the nursery as it is... it still needs quite a bit of work, right??